When you walk into a home that just feels right, chances are it wasn’t an accident. A cohesive home has an identity, one that reflects the people living there. It flows room to room, tells a story through a mix of finishes and textures, and feels warm without being overdone.
But cohesion doesn’t mean “matching everything,” and it definitely doesn’t mean playing it safe. In fact, trying too hard to make everything match is often what makes a space feel flat and disconnected.
If you’re building, renovating, or just trying to pull your home together, here are three common mistakes to avoid:
1. Overmatching Everything
Buying all your lighting, plumbing, and hardware in the same finish and from the same collection might feel like the safe choice—but it’s rarely the right one. In fact, that’s the fastest way to make a space feel one-dimensional.
Design isn’t about choosing the “right” finish. It’s about balancing contrast, texture, and tone. I always tell my clients: don’t be afraid to mix metals. Pair a polished nickel faucet with a warm bronze sconce. Use a bold pendant over the island and let the cabinet hardware fade into the background.
Cohesion comes from intention, not from making everything match.
2. Forgetting the Character
Yes, even modern homes need character. And no, it doesn’t mean adding excessive moulding everywhere.
I often see homes that look clean and new, but feel cold and empty. That’s usually because they’re missing the quiet details that give a space life: meaningful materials, and thoughtful transitions. How two surfaces meet and how two spaces come together matters. Bringing character into your home means bringing in your personality. Your house shouldn’t feel like it was built in a day, it should feel like you have spent your entire life filling it. These are the kinds of things that bring quiet luxury into a space.
3. Ignoring the Power of Paint
Sometimes the biggest problem in a room isn’t the layout or the lighting, it’s the paint color.
I can’t tell you how often I walk into a space that feels “off,” and it turns out the paint is just a little too blue… or there’s a yellow undertone that throws off the entire palette. Choosing the right white or neutral isn’t easy, and getting it wrong can clash with everything else you’ve chosen, even if all your materials are beautiful on their own.
Paint has the power to either tie everything together or throw the whole thing out of balance. Use it intentionally, and you’ll see the difference immediately.
My tip is to get large paint samples, tape them up in two different walls in the room in questions and study how they change as the day goes on. Paint colors will gas light you if you’re not careful.
Want a Home That Actually Feels Like You?
Helping clients make design decisions that make sense, from lighting combinations to paint colors to finishes that play well together, is exactly what I do.
If you’re stuck between 10 tabs of sconces and second-guessing every paint color, you’re not alone.
Credits: Photographer Allison Elefante